I’ve got a situation going on at the moment where my kids have had to make some choices for this term.
My oldest son at the opportunity to take on a theme based extension learning class on a Friday. Great opportunity … however his choice to do this would stop him from participating in the winter ski programme. It would have been slightly tricky for me to juggle depending on his choice here but I let him make it ….
Ultimately, it’s his last year at primary school and his last opportunity to do the ski programme, whereas there could be an opportunity to to the learning programme, or part of it, later in the year. So, he chose skiing.
Choosing skiing has also meant that he can’t play futsal this term, but although initially he was a bit bummed out by it, he’s now fine with his decisions – for me, these are important steps that he needs to take as he grows up.
The biggest problem I find is when parents leap in to solve the issue for their kids so that the short period of pain and disappointment of making a choice isn’t there.
There is a lot of learning to be had from grieving the decision NOT made. There is learning to be had from choosing the best option, and sticking with that decision.
My younger kids have also started to understand this issue where they have realised that the ski programme means that they too miss out on stuff in the classroom, like electives, or art-time, or ‘Choice Day’ or one ice skating day ….. Although I have since discovered that to eleviate the pain of those kids missing out on one of two ice skating sessions, catch up days are now being offered.
I’m definitely at a dilemma here – personally I believe that some decisions are hard, but leaping in to offer alternatives doesn’t serve our kids in the best way. I know my kids would love to NOT miss out on anything, but my long term goal is to help them navigate the decisions they make.
When do you let your children learn about the process of decision-making? I’d love your thoughts.